Darktiara's Journals

Annoyed!

I'm a little ticked off today for two reasons.

One, I was the only person in my year to score an A in my GCSE's, I've never had alcohol, smoked, done drugs, I've never even been out the house past six. And my parents treat me as if I were the worst child in the world. If I don't do a piece of homework the day I get it, I'm a lazy so and so. If I'm in an upset mood because of the people at school and I'm depressing, and a complete idiot, and I need to get a life. I know it's normal teenage stuff but it's every day! Though I am grateful they haven't hit me in a while lol.

And then there's my brother. He'll ask for something new every day, he's gotten new clothes, phone upgrades, a MAC, shoes, blablabla all in the space of a month. I asked my parents whether I could dye my hair underneath, paying for it myself. The response was "Jesus, no! For God's sake I'm busy". And when I ask why not my dad comes in with a bunch of swearing and calls me pathetic. I was just confused... I've never asked for anything this entire year, I can't even remember asking for anything last year. I don't care that much, it's just if my brother can have what he wants, why can't I at least get a valid reason why I can't have one thing?

And second, I'm being hit on by a girl I haven't spoke to in months. My ex-friend came up to me the other day and gave me her new number, telling me to text her, so I did. And she sends a text saying that she's bi and she likes me, and wants to know if I'm bi too. So instead of giving me a casual "I'm good thanks, just started college" it's like a smack in the face. It kind of felt even worse because my ex-friends were spreading rumours that I'm bi when I most definitely am not. I actually haven't been teased in a while, which is great, but if it starts up again someone's getting hit.

On the plus side, I'm off to a beauty show with my aunt and uncle on Sunday so that should be good. I might get free products and fashion tips that I can post about :) Anyway, have some eye candy.

Random beauty tips

These are just some random beauty tips I found from various websites and people. I take hair and beauty at my school, so I get some advice from there too. They're probably only little things that everyone already knows but I just felt like making a journal in case anyone didn't know.

Hair

Use a soft hairbrush with natural bristles only. This stops the hair and scalp getting damaged.

Use a widetooth comb, especially when your hair is wet and at its most vulnerable.

Use hot water on your hair before shampooing, this opens your hair shaft much like your pores.

Rinse with cold water, this closes the shaft as well as helping with softness and shine.

Only apply shampoo to the scalp, the ends from the neck down don't need it.

Hair should be shampooed twice a week, every other day at most. Washing hair every day will make your hair become dry because of the amount of oil you're washing out.

Apply conditioner to the ends (three inches from your scalp), this is where the moisture is needed most.

Cooling your conditioner in the fridge will seal hair cuticles straight away because of the low temperature.

Comb hair through (with a widetooth comb) while the conditioner is still in your hair, this makes it easier to rinse and also when combing hair afterwards.

Rinse hair then rinse again, this ensures all the product is out of your hair and helps give it a clean and silky finish.

Apply mousse to the roots of your hair only and hold each section upwards while blow drying underneath. This gives your hair volume without it appearing stringy.

Spritz holding spray onto an eyebrow brush and apply to both eyebrows and flyaways to keep them in place.

When clipping hair back for make-up, make sure to place a tissue between your hair and the clip to prevent creases.

Baby powder can be applied to the roots of your hair to disguise greasiness.

Combing hair regularly helps spread natural oils to keep hair healthy and shiny.

Massaging your scalp before bed helps stimulate the blood circulation needed to keep hair in good health.

Lemon juice and beer lightens hair, beer is also good for brown hair.

Vinegar helps with oily hair.

Skin care

Drink plenty of water (6-8 glasses a day, more in the morning, less at night. Drinking water at night, and also eating salty products, leads to cheek puffiness the following morning).

Eat healthily (fruit and veg, vitamins).

Use a non-oily make-up remover to help prevent spots.

Try and avoid make-up wipes as these tend to dry your skin out. Instead use a liquid or cream eye make-up remover along with a cleanser for the rest of the face and lips.

Cleanse, tone, and moisturise daily to clean, freshen, and smooth skin. Always apply in an upwards motion and start at the neck.

Use an exfoliant (face and body) and a face mask once a week. Over-exfoliating will strip the skin of natural oils, making it dry.

Honey helps make skin soft.

Brown sugar makes a good exfoliant.

Steamy showers are helpful before plucking eyebrows or removing blackheads. The steam softens them.

Use cocoa butter on scars and stretch marks to lighten them.

Exfoliate lips by rubbing them in a gentle circular motion with a clean toothbrush or damp cloth.

Use vaseline on eyelashes to make them stand out and look longer, on eyelids and cheeks to give shine, lips to give shine and softness, and elbows and heels to treat dry skin. This works better if you wear socks and leave them on overnight.

Perfume and toothpaste are both natural remedies for spots.

Organic apple cider vinegar does wonders for acne, as does fresh air.

Sleeping on your back is better for your skin. During sleep, there is a lot of pressure on the face, leading to more wrinkles.

Sleeping with two pillows helps the blood circulation.

Use a natural bristle body brush before having a bath or shower, it helps with the blood circulation, keeping skin healthy and helping with dark veins.

Treat your skin like the finest silk, never scrub your skin harshly (especially on the face).

Nail care

Soak nails in lemon juice once a week/month to remove stains and brighten them.

File nails once every other day to help them grow stronger.

Buff nails once a month to smooth out ridges and add natural shine.

Apply moisturiser to nails and wear gloves to bed to keep them healthy and prevent them getting dry.

Make-up

The proper order of make-up application is: concealer, foundation, translucent/loose powder, blusher, eyeliner, eyeshadow, mascara, lip liner, lip stick, and lip gloss. Make-up should be applied after cleansing, toning, and moisturising.

Always apply foundation in a downwards motion to prevent the hairs on your face standing up. Use powder-based foundation if your skin is oily, and liquid if your skin is dry.

Green-based concealer is good for covering blemishes.

Concealer also makes a good base for eyeshadow, it gives the shadow something to grab onto.

Use a tissue when applying eye make-up, your fingers should never touch your face. This will spread oil and bacteria.

Apply blush to the apples of your cheeks only, it helps if you swipe a small amount of blusher on while smiling, so you can feel where the blusher should go.

Wetting your eye-shadow brush slightly will turn your eye-shadow into a paste, helping it stick to your eyelids. This will also make it brighter and it should last longer.

When curling eyelashes, always apply mascara after once has been fully curled. If you curl both, by the time you go to apply your mascara, you will have lost the curl.

Curl at the base, middle, and tips of your lashes. This helps with the shape and prevents it going jagged. You should hold your curlers for fifteen seconds.

Apply mascara in a zig-zag motion. This helps separate lashes and prevent clumping. Comb them through with an eyelash comb afterwards.

Never pump your mascara. Unwanted bacteria will get in. Instead, use a twisting motion as you pull the wand out. This is will ensure you have enough of the product on your wand to work with.

If your mascara dries up, apply a few drop of eye make-up remover and mix it with the wand.

Lip liner can be applied outside the lips to make them appear fuller, and inside if you want them thinner. It's good to apply foundation to them beforehand so the outside if the lips blend in. Never go too far in or out though, as it will look fake.

For lip stick, put some baby powder on your lips after applying one layer, then apply another layer over the top. This helps set the lip stick and it will last longer.

Fashion

Avoid too much black, it will always look too harsh if you wear a massive amount.

If you're wearing glitter make-up or clothing, avoid adding too much of any other glitter or shine to your outfit, including accessories, as it can come across tacky.

Massive sunglasses. Not just big ones, but the huge ones that aren't suited to your face shape.

Smiling girls always look better than pouting girls.

Stores that sell good beauty products

LUSH do some really good products like cleansers, toners, moisturisers etc all made from natural ingredients.

The Body Shop are also good for products, and also for make-up and make-up brushes. They also have the different sections of products depending on your skin type.

Back to school rant

Well, I'm back to school soon and it's just bleh :( I already moved up to year 11 in May but we're not getting new teachers until we go back, which sucks. Our art teacher left so we're getting a new one of those, and some new English teachers are coming in and probably some more substitutes.

Everyone's getting scared about getting a dumb teacher but I'm more worried about whether they're strict or not. I'm never naughty but I'm always in a bad mood at school and don't like being bossed around, resulting in me getting yelled at and everyone else laughing. I'd rather have a teacher I'm comfortable with or else I can't really focus on my work peacefully anyway.

Off-topic cuteness interlude:

School might be okay because at least then I'll be getting some structure back into my day. AKA not sleeping in until the afternoon xD I kinda want to get learning again but the teaching system at my school is terrible. You'd get a better education if you just sat at a computer on your own and looked it up. Also, my school have introduced this whole new system. In tutor groups (home room), there are going to be a few students from each year instead of us all being in the same year. Even the 6th formers are in with us!

And our days end at different times, we go straight to lessons instead of signing in and then there's lunchtime which is actually the most confusing... The school gets split in half, and half of us will go to our form groups for twenty minutes while the others have their lunch, and then the people in their forms will go out and be able to mix with the others for twenty minutes. And then they will go back to their form for their twenty minutes while we stay out for the remainder. I used to think school was just for learning but it now seems it's like a game of survival. I don't like being stereotyped or bullied, or bossed around and confused at where I should and when. I just want to plonk my books down and get to work, you know? It could quite possibly end up like this:

My school have also added our homework topics to their school website, and for English it's: Design a character for a horror story. My first thought was "Mary Sue and Edward Cullen." All the girls are absolutely obsessed with it, and I personally can't stand it. Just because people like something, it doesn't mean they have to obsess over it constantly to everyone else. If you like it then great, but I hate it when people just don't know when to keep it on the down low. I don't express how much I like certain bands or books. Heck, I mentioned Cirque du Freak ONE TIME to my ex-friend who's Twi-crazed and she's like "God, will you just shut up about it!" I mean wow...

Just one more moany thing I promise. My friend keeps whining at me saying she wants to be an actress and asks me if she has a shot at it. I said of course she does, she could join a drama club, theatre school, anything she can to help her succeed in the career she wants. But she just had this kind of mortified expression on her face. Sitting at home watching Disney Channel is fine to get inspiration when that's what you want to do, but you'll never excel or be able to do what you want if you dont work for it. Agreed, some people get lucky. But you can't just sit around expecting everything to come to you. I don't mean to sound horrible, it just annoys me when people are actually 'serious' about all these great ambitions but never put in anything to get it. If that was the way, we could all be famous. Famous as in working famous, Paris Hilton along with some others don't count >_>

Congrats if you actually read this meaningless crap, have a doughnut.

Have a laugh

I just found this really funny drabble generator website, everyone probably already knows it but it's so funny hehe:

http://www.prillalar.com/drabbles/

You just type in what it tells you to and you get the weirdest most random short stories ever. They made me laugh.

I'm half way through my holidays now and am watching Hellsing xD It's addictive for me, I'm hooked. I'm really sad but I kinda want Alucard's gloves :S. I'd make them if I had the stuff and skills.

I've just found out that more people from school have been talking about me behind my back >.> I understand that people hate me but if you really hate someone wouldn't you just keep your mouth shut about them? Especially if they're as bad as they're making out. Not that I've even done anything. I do my best to never talk bad about anyone. It slips when I'm angry but other than that I just try to be positive and not dwell on things.

And luckily my school have organised a free trip to Thorpe Park so I'll be going there on the 24th (2 days after my birthday!) So I'm pleased about that. I'm going to go round on my own though because my friends are too scared of the big rides xD If you ever go to Thorpe Park, this ride below (Rush) is the one to go on :) Along with Samurai of course.

And I should go because it's midnight over here. But it doesn't matter because no one's even reading this. So yeah, goodbye. I leave you Miss Moody Princess Ciel Phantomhive. You know you want his girl's outfit. Well I do ;_; I even tried drawing it LOL. Crap but oh well :(

Rikku xoxo

Chase the Morning

Guess what I watched.

Repo! The Genetic Opera. If you haven't seen it, I think you should. Especially if you're into Rock Opera. The songs are catchy, I keep trying to sing them. The Graverobber looks a little like a younger Boy George. It was also from the director and producers of SAW.

I've been doing work experience and then I have six weeks holiday then back to school. Ready to see that stupid friend again. He's an ungrateful bastard. I always try my best for friends and get nothing back. If I'm ever in a bad mood he says "You can at least try to be happy" or "You've made new friends and forgot about me!"

I'm just thinking, grow up. I purposely cut down my time seeing other friends just to see him because he's so anti-social and awkward I had to make more time for him. I don't see why people can't just be satisfied with what they have. Life is about survival, I don't believe in everything being perfect and happy. Negative I know, but someone's got to be.

Has anyone ever been on this? I have and I found it addicting. The SAW ride at Thorpe Park is really good too, I think horror-based rides are so awesome and spooky. I'm in a random mood today, listening to Danger*Gang. They're an all-girl Visual Kei group. I hope you're all enjoying/enjoyed/preparing to enjoy your Summer holidays.

Oh and check out Secret Garden by Gackt.

Rikku x

Without you, time goes so slow

I've been so stressed out and upset lately it's unbelievable. I desperately need a break. I've finished my exams for the time being, but school and home is just weighing me down so much. If I'm not getting ignored or teased at school I'm getting yelled at by my parents. It's just so hard to be happy right now. I'm supposed to be getting counselling but I have no idea when and where to go and I just can't be bothered. I think I'm being dragged to a session tomorrow though.

I watched The Corpse Bride either Friday or Saturday. It's such a sweet film, I think Tim Burton is amazing. And that movie holds probably my favourite quote ever: Can a heart still break once it's stopped beating? It might be because I'm negative, but I think it's pretty incredible. Watching movies is probably the only thing I can do to take my mind off things. No one will probably even read this journal but it's just nice to let everything out. It's really hard to occupy myself when there's nothing to do and no one to do it with. I'm hoping things will get better with time, but I highly doubt it.

I think I've regained my love for Misa Amane. Especially in the second Death Note live action. Obviously the anime and manga are still better, but Erika is really good in her role, or at least to me. She's like a fashion icon to me at the moment. And I can really sympathise with the way she's always so determined towards Kira, I'm kind of like that with a 'friend' of mine. Speaking of which, I think that person's pretty mad at me right now. I'm overprotective and worried about him all the time, he hasn't been texting back for ages which is really unlike him. I hope he talks soon but I think he's sick of me. Which is pretty unfortunate because I might be with him in form in September onwards.

Either way, I hope things start to get better. I've been looking around at colleges and it's really nerve-racking. I'm not sure what I want to do yet, I may just have to stay on in sixth form. My parents are always moaning at me saying I need to stay on to get more confident. I really want to go into Beauty, especially make-up. I figured that out ages ago. But now I'm doing Hair at school I'm kind of interested in that route as well. I might be able to do both at college, who knows. This picture is of L and Misa by the way, and it's from deviantART. School is going to be a nightmare tomorrow, and I have lots of impossible homework. Just wish the holidays would come already.

Rikku x